There are many misconceptions out there when it comes to moms of large families. Having many kids certainly isn’t for everyone. But I can assure you it’s not what most people think either . Read on to check out 11 misconceptions about moms of large families.
My mom is #5 of 15 brothers and sisters. Although I’m an only child I never thought twice about large families. On the contrary I use to love having all those aunts and uncles, cousins and family at every event.
Hearing stories about the bus my grandfather drove around getting the kids from one place to the other seemed so exciting.
It’s funny though when I grew up and now have a large family of my own , I didn’t realize how many misconceptions people have when it comes to large families. As well as the comments we would get because of our large family. Most important what Moms of large families look or act like.
So I’ve decided to put together a list of 11 of them. Having many kids certainly isn’t for everyone. But I can assure you it’s not what most people think either .
11 Common misconceptions about Moms of Large Families
Whenever I tell people I have 6 kids the first thing that comes out of their mouths is : Do you know the Duggars. To begin with the First Misconception: I’ve never met the Duggars :).
We all homeschool:
This is probably the second biggest misconception. I actually have all my kids in public school. That being said I have homeschooled in the past. The main reason being was I knew what I could give my kids at the time was more they could get at school.
That being said, I knew when to hang up the chalk and send them to school.
So not every Large Family homeschools. That being said, I’ve seen some kids come from large families that have homeschooled that have gone on to do amazing things so even if they do homeschool that’s not such a bad thing.
You don’t seem like you have X amount of kids, and you don’t LOOK like you have X kids!”.
I ALWAYS get this one like I’m supposed to look a certain way. It does make me feel better than not, but it always makes me laugh. It almost seems like moms of many kids need to look like the old Lady in the shoe.
Don’t get me wrong, there are days I’m pretty sure I would be her twin. That also doesn’t mean I don’t love getting all dressed up and looking nice.
But I can assure you, you wouldn’t pick out the mom of 8 in a crowd of moms of 1 or 2 . However, This one always makes me laugh.
I have friends with 4-15 kids that look better than friends with 1 or 2 kids. If anything, all of my friends with 4+ kids look AMAZING! So yes, we can pull it together when we have to.
You have too many children to give them what they need:
If you want to buy them the moon and stars then yes you will not be able to give them everything they need.
That being said we have limits just like any other family. Just like I did growing up as an only child. The important thing is not feel guilty about what you don’t give.
Even if we had just 1 child ,there are stuff I wouldn’t give.
The important thing is teach them to appreciate what they do have and if there’s something they really want then they earn it. Just like my parents did to me as an only child.
We must be so patient:
Heck to the NO! I am the most inpatient person there is. That being said I’m all about perspective. Is it worth freaking out over the little things, nah. I think that’s why most moms of large families end up looking like they’re patient or superhuman.
We just realize there are things you stress out about and there are things you don’t.
Moms of many kids don’t love their kids as much as moms of 2 or less kids:
When I had my first and was about to give birth to my second I’m not going to lie I was worried. I loved him so much and couldn’t imagine for one second that I would love #2 as much. Wow, could I have been any more wrong. It’s amazing how much love you have for each and everyone of your littles.
Most important how you realize that your life is so much more better for having each one and can’t imagine your life without any of them.
We’re all on welfare because kids are expensive:
Well that goes back to trying to give your child the moon and the stars. I’m blessed because my husband has an amazing job that allows me to stay home with the little dudes.
That being said it’s nice that I’m able to blog in order to help with the income. However, the majority of parents with a lot of kids are able to balance the budget just right without having to ask Uncle Sam for help.
It’s all about perspective about what’s important and teaching your children to live within your means.
We’re all part of some weird cult.
Ok granted I’m Catholic and well the church does teach us not use artificial birth control. That being said many moms actually want a lot of kids. To be honest with you, even if I wasn’t Catholic I love our big, huge family.
Everyone of them bring something special to the table.
You have too many kids to take care of
To be completely honest I feel like I was at my most overwhelmed when I went from 1-2. Our children are individuals. We are not running an orphanage or herding animals. We strive to bring out our children’s individual strengths and interests.
So although we have a lot of kids most large families treat them with love, respect and fairness. Most important unless you have multiples when you have a lot of kids chances are there’s only 1 or 2 at a time that really need true caring for. The rest you help guide them on their path.
They do not raise each other (Although they try)
All our children are expected to contribute to the household and to the family in a positive way. We try to encourage all our children to invest in each other but they do not raise each other.
This is huge for us.
Yes, I’ll ask them to help but not for myself so much as to teach them responsibility. However, the parenting falls on my husband and I and we’re the final authority front in our home.
YES, I am well aware of how “it” happens
Thank you for asking but yes, I’m fully aware of where kids come. I mean doesn’t everyone know the stork brings them 😉
Moms of many kids lead a horrible life because they’re baby machines
Let me be quite truthful with you on this last point. I am living my best life right now and loving it.
I went to college, got a degree and even had a career. But to be completely honest, I wouldn’t change it for the life I lead right now.
Yes, it can be exhausting but it’s not because I have 6 kids running around.
Honestly, it’s exhausting because what parent isn’t exhausted? I feel so honored and blessed to have all these beautiful children that are all extremely different and wonderful in their own unique way.
So yes, I am fully aware my family is a novelty. For many it’s even a thing of the past that just doesn’t exist anymore. However, if you look around there are lots of big, beautiful families around that have the same hardships and worries that parents of 1-2 kids have.
Is it hard, yes. Is it easy, yes. But I have to say I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Did you know it’s actually easier having more kids? Head over here to find out why 5 kids are easier than 1